Thursday, December 1, 2011

So...when we gettin' married?

Meet my husband.

He and I met online before meeting people online was cool. In fact, in 1999, it was pretty damn scary still. You didn't know what kind of psycho you could end up with. Fortunately, I was less scary than the other psychos who answered his personals ad. Go me!

We had an insanely brief courtship. We met in August and just a few weeks later, as I came out of the bathroom wearing purple leggings and my stupid orange sweatshirt (yes, the one I wear in 90% of my Bubbletweets), he proposed to me.

"So. When we gettin' married?"

I laughed at him. 

Keep in mind, I'd been separated from my ex-husband for several months when we met, but had only been officially divorced six days when we had our first date. Marriage was not what I set out for when I responded to his email.

I asked him if he was kidding. He insisted he wasn't. I kept giggling, but when I saw the light drain from his eyes, I knew he was serious. This man wanted to marry me! Me and my kids (who were 2 and 4 at the time). Me, my kids and my insane family. Me, my kids, my insane family and an ex-husband who would be none-too-thrilled with the idea of me marrying someone within a year of my divorce. This guy was either amazeballs or a complete idiot.

I thought quickly and decided that in case it was the first option, I should say yes and we were married two months later.

Over the course of the last twelve years, I've given him a lot of guff over his spontaneous and less-than-romantic marriage proposal. A LOT. And, he's taken it in good stride, God bless him. 

Tonight, I showed him the link to this story about man who proposed to his girlfriend and had their proposal secretly photographed then gave her a framed photo of that magical moment on their wedding day. I thought it was the sweetest thing I'd ever seen. Hubs, however, looked at me and with the saddest look on his face, said, "I wish I'd put more thought into your proposal."

It made me think back to how I would have liked to have been proposed to. Would there have been a horse-drawn carriage? Perhaps candlelight and soft music? Skywriting with an airplane or on a billboard at a ballpark? 


It would have been me coming out of the bathroom wearing that stupid orange sweatshirt and him catching me so totally off-guard that I laughed at the absurdity of it all. Anything more romantic wouldn't have been the real him. And the real him is who I fell in love with all those years ago. 

And I'd still say "yes."

(Author's note: By the way, it WAS the first option: he's totally amazeballs. He puts up with my endless array of shit on a daily basis, after all.)

P.S. Dear Hubby, this does not get you off the hook for not bringing in the Christmas decorations from the shed while I was gone last week or for snoring every. single. night. of the last twelve years. But it does mean I'll stop giving you shit about your corny proposal. I love you.)

P.P.S. Regardless of what you've heard on television, NO. I am not leaving you for Dane Cook.


  1. Sometimes the simplest things are the best! My husband proposed in a mall parking lot, because he just couldn't wait anymore :)